The story of “Just A Brown Bird”

The current self portrait. The birds, my kids, the stars, our glimmers in life.

The story behind my new business name (formerly known as Abby Lynne artist):

My last name is Brown

If there are unseen forces sending us messages- the birds always find a way to get them to me.

The days after moving to Asheville almost 7 years ago were treacherous. I hit my lowest mental state, a place I didn't even know I could get.

I sought help immediately and started trauma specialized therapy.

That week I started, a wren made her nest on my back patio.

The image quality is terrible, but hey, it was 2020. If you look closely, you can see the very tiny beak of one of the baby birds in the nest.

Soon after the babies hatched we had typical Appalachian high winds sweep through the valley, and the nest and all three of her babies fell out.

I cried so much over these damn birds y'all- I FaceTimed my mom just so she could talk me through getting them back in their nest.

I had never seen a baby bird that new before.

Their necks were so long and delicate!

They had no feathers at all yet!

All three of them were splayed out on my patio,

I thought they were dead.

Just like I thought I was dead, my marriage, my sense of self, and my ability to be the mom I wanted to be.

Through giant sobs I discovered they were all very much alive, and I gently returned them to the nest.

I sat by the window waiting for momma bird to come back.

I breastfed by the window,

late lunch by the window,

I read books to my toddler by that window.

I couldn't leave.

I COULD NOT LEAVE.

I chose to stay.

By the window.

A picture from that time. With both of my children, I wish I could go back and Hug myself, and tell her that she’s good enough. She figured it out though.

And the momma came back, and her babies fed and fed for days, then all flew away shortly after.

Such a little moment.

Just a brown bird, that changed me so profoundly.

So,

Here's to them, all three of them for pulling through the winds.

It’s wild to see 27 on a birthday cake, and realize how young I was.